Omegle chat log 1

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: You see, I was thinking about getting my testicles laminated.

You: Sound like a good idea?

Stranger: Oh really? Well the thing is, you have to take a wholistic approach.

Stranger: You have to consider each pro and con and eventually see what the balance shows.

Stranger: On the bright side, your balls are shiny and beautiful.

You: Well, the pros are that I'll have shiny testes.

Stranger: Unfortunately.. some females may not like that kind of thing, or guys if you're into that.

You: Nah, I'm not into guys.

You: I'm a lesbian.

Stranger: Oh cool!

You: Yep. I got the testicles off of ebay.

Stranger: so how did you acquire - ah, gotcha

Stranger: What color are they?

You: I wanted kids some day, so now I have a vagina that can shoot sperm.

You: White, but they shoot blue fluids out of my vagina.

You: I have blue skeet, you see.

Stranger: Hmm, interesting. Is it fluorescent?

You: Yes, actually.

Stranger: I've actually been doing research at my lab in Virginia about this phenomenon.

You: But that could be from the glow stick I stuck in my vagina last year.

Stranger: When exposed to the styrofoam from the package you got it in, these testicles seem to react in a way that, as you have seen, causes your ejaculate to turn blue.

Stranger: Oh, well there's that too.

Stranger: Hmmm.. Maybe.. there's a common element in the glowstick and the styrofoam.

You: The glow stick was green, though. Just the normal kind.

Stranger: Regardless, you may have just allowed me to make a breakthrough

You: So, it can't be that that's turning my ejaculate blue.

Stranger: Well, here's the thing.

Stranger: Did the glow stick WIDEN your vagina

You: No, I masturbate a lot, so I'm fairly loose. I like shoving large things in it.

You: The glow stick was only about half an inch wide.

Stranger: Hm, interesting.

Stranger: Did the glow stick break off in your vagina?

You: I'm not sure, actually.

Stranger: Did you see any leaking fluids aside from your vaginal secretions?

You: But, it has been turning my menstrual blood a glowing pink.

You: Sometimes it does turn it a glowing orange, though.

Stranger: Ahh, that's normal.

Stranger: It's a phenomenon called The Scourge of the Oompa Loompa

You: Good, I was actually worried about that.

You: Ahh. I have noticed my pubic hair turning a slight tint of green lately.

Stranger: Ohh that's nothing big

Stranger: it just means that when you're sleeping

Stranger: Heath Ledger's spirit has been eating you out

Stranger: Well, it's been a pleasure. I'm actually heading out to eat right now, thank you for your intriguing insights!

You: Ahh. Well, I'd rather it be Rosie O' Donnel.

You: Or however her name is spelled.

You: But, thank you for the information, I'll need to head out to smoke.

Stranger: Later homebooooy

You: Later.