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Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Hardcore Parkour

Am I the only person sick of seeing ''parkour'' being thrown around any time a custom map or a game has anything involving jumping and possibly dying?  That's not parkour, that's platforming.  Last I checked there were only a few games that actually involved parkour.  There's one MMO parkour game that I know of called FreeJack, and another single-player story based game called Mirror's Edge.  I've only played those two, so I'm not sure about others, but it's fucking annoying to hear people call platforming parkour.  Parkour is getting from A to B as quickly as you can without wasting energy.  Platforming is jumping between platforms.  Period.  Fuck.  You.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Pop Punk.

To my knowledge, this is an oxymoron.  I've always thought that punk was supposed to be underground, and pop means it's popular.  That may have been stating the obvious, but I feel the need to, as we're apparently too stupid to realize that punk is functionally incapable of being pop.  Punk is supposed to be against everything mainstream, not be mainstream.  It may seem like I'm dragging this on, but fuck, that's one of the biggest oxymora I can think of.  The only one that's music related I can think of is soft rock.  Rock is supposed to be hard, that's why they called it rock in the first place.  Metal is supposed to be a harder form of rock, as it is in a real-world context.  Hard rock and soft rock don't exist.  There is Rock, there is Metal, and there's pussy music.  Most of you people listen to the latter of that group.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Adult Language

Over the years I've noticed that there are words that are considered adult language.  Now I'm curious as to why they're considered to be for adults when we condemn those adults who use them.  If adults can't use them since they'd be considered immature if they did, why shouldn't children be able to use them?  Aren't children known for being immature?  If so, then why can't they use language made for immature adults?  I'm confused on this one.  I mean, I would be considered immature if I said fuck every now and again, but I'd be punished as a child if I said the same thing at the same rate.  I don't understand the logic behind that.  That coupled with the fact that most adults want to be kids again really boggles me.  If they want to be kids you'd assume they'd be using immature language more often than they do now.  But they don't.  They condemn the people who use it as immature, and I don't see why they would.  Contradictory and possibly hypocritical, if you ask me.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Women's Strength

I'm sick of these posts popping up everywhere.  I'm sure I can't be the only one.  The posts about how strong women are because they wear heels, can carry a baby, etcetera, etcetera.  I'm sorry if I can't carry a baby, but I can wear high heels.  I choose not to because I think it's stupid for anyone to wear them.  They're badly designed most of the time and fuck your feet up miserably.  Then they say that they're strong because they can burn their foreheads with curling/straightening irons and not give it a second thought.  Again, this strength is caused by superficial bullshit that shouldn't be done in the first place.  Half the women spend three hours straightening their hair because they don't want it curly, and the other half curl it because they don't want it straight.  Why should we bother doing this?  Both hairstyles are equally good looking in today's society, so why even bother picking?  Then there's the make-up deal, which is even worse.  They regularly spend money on things to make themselves look 'prettier' when they don't even have to bother.  Poor women buy these things, at that, which is even worse.  But, even worse than that whole shit storm is when they say they can cry themselves to sleep and then pretend it didn't happen.  Why should this be used to state strength?  Hasn't crying been used to show weakness since the beginning of recorded history?  Granted, the recovery is more important than the mistake, but still.  We shouldn't allow this to be thrown around since men can do it to.  Some of us do, at that.  Most of us just realize about thirty seconds in that we can just as easily do something more productive with our time than cry.  Why should women be awarded for this while men are frowned upon for it?  Then again, it could be some sort of revenge, since men are allowed to fuck anything that walks and be considered a king, while if women do it they're considered a slut.  I frown upon both equally, though.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Addiction

I'll never understand why rehab is so popular nowadays.  The only thing they do there is limit your consumption of your poison of choice until you're fully off of it.  To my way of thinking, anyone with a good mind should be able to do that on their own.  I mean, it's just weaning, which isn't really worth the money if you ask me.  Anything you can do yourself shouldn't really be paid for.  Especially on something that you'd otherwise be saving money on.  Being addicted to something and then weaning yourself off would save you money in the long run, so why pay someone to help you with it?  I understand that most people can't because they're too weak, but we're enabling worse behaviour by supporting people with weak minds.  It's sort of like the welfare issue that I love to bitch about so much.  We're supporting the wrong types of people.  And I understand that addiction is a difficult thing to overcome solo, but people used to do it all the time.  So why can't we do it now?  I'm confused.

Friday, September 14, 2012

People are Strange.

They had a story on my local news today about a man who went around kissing random people.  He wound up getting charged for assault.  What I don't understand is why he got charged for assault.  I've always thought that assault was a more serious thing.  You know, like rape, beating the shit out of people, and other things of that nature.  There are some people who would love to get kissed randomly on the street.  By anyone, for that matter.  I just don't understand why some people would get so offended by that sort of thing.  It's not like it would cause any sort of psychological trauma on anyone who doesn't already have some form of history of such trauma.  The only people it would really affect are people who were more sheltered growing up than I was, which is saying something.  This country is becoming a place of complete intolerance for anything that can even be remotely related to sex.  Which is just about everything in my mind.  You can relate anything to sex with less than six links between the two.  But good lord, people will always be strange.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Cloning

Now, as we all know cloning replicates your DNA perfectly into another living being.  It doesn't copy the consciousness, though.  The conscious of both beings will remain separate for the entire time they're living.  No matter how hard you try, their memories will be completely different.  If the clone decides it's a good idea to stick his head out of a car going 50 MPH and let his head ping off a light post, then he will have that memory.  If he survives, that is.  The non-cloned individual may have the memory of the clone doing it, but he won't have the same perspective on it that the clone has.  Even if you're participating in the same event both people will have different perspectives of it.  If you both go to the same fair at the same exact time, you'll both see it differently.  Now, having said all of this, this should answer this age-old question.  If you have sex with your clone, is it masturbation or gay sex?  At this point the answer should be obvious.  It's gay sex.  It can't be masturbation as the definition of masturbation states that the same entity must be rubbing its own private areas.  I hope that cleared up the suspicion for most of you men out there that you can have sex with your clone and not be considered gay.  Now I just have to apply logic to whether or not sticking your own dick inside your ass hole is gay sex or masturbation.  I'm assuming masturbation, but I'll give it a little more thought before saying that's a fact.

Monday, September 10, 2012

Phrases

Now, before I start the actual topic, I'd like to say that I come from a pretty unintelligent area.  Very few people here can pronounce any words correctly.  Now, having said this, most of my problems understanding some phrases were due to incorrect pronunciation.  I didn't even know what the phrase ''once in a while'' meant until I realized it wasn't ''once in a wow.''  The mispronunciations were just that bad.  I'd now like to move on to other phrases that don't make sense to me.  A good example of this is ''brain fart.''  At least when it's used with its proper definition.  Its proper definition is when you can't think of an idea.  Not even a bad one.  I think it should mean when you can only think of bad ideas.  Then again, most people have that quite often.  In the sense they use brain fart they should be using mental block.  Mental block makes sense to me.  It means your mind has been blocked from forming any thoughts.  Now, if my definition of brain fart becomes vocalized, it's called diarrhea of the mouth.  I'm not sure about you, but all of this concern about the shared lower anatomy of the human species disturbs me a bit.  I mean, most of our society is disturbed by nasty things, so why do we have such an obsession with such things?  Granted, I don't find them nasty, but most people do.  I'll never understand why we have such an obsession with things we find so disgusting.  Then again, it could explain the two girls one cup phenomena.  If you don't think about it too much, that is.

Friday, September 7, 2012

Topless Rights for None!

Fuck the shit that's been going around about ''Topless Rights for All!''  As far as I'm concerned no one should be going around topless.  No one does it except for the people lacking in intellect if you haven't noticed, and since those are the people whom I think shouldn't be allowed into the voting booth every fourth November, I don't think they should be walking around.  Much less topless.  That and it just seems like they want to show off their so-called abs.  I don't think this is attractive to anyone any more and should be stopped immediately.  These are the same people who whine when it gets lower than eighty degrees, also.  They say it's too cold.  Maybe if they wouldn't walk around all year with their shirt off like the moron they are it wouldn't feel as cold.  Hell, some of them even walk outside without a shirt mid-winter just so they can complain about how cold it is.  I'll never understand this, honestly.  Why would people intentionally do something they know will make them uncomfortable and then feel the need to bitch about it?  Seems fairly useless to me.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Jesus

I'd like to say something about organized religions.  They haven't made sense to me in years.  The reason could be that I grew up in a religion that believed in Jesus.  Now, if you're wondering why that would lead an entire set of religions to confuse me, here's why.  That whole Jesus Messiah Son of God fable is a way for people to pass the punishments of what they have done on someone else.  If you accept Jesus as your lord and saviour you're going to get into heaven.  I find that fairly immoral.  Passing the punishment for your own wrong doings onto someone else while you still get the bonus of doing it?  Why can't we do that in real life?  It seems like it would really help a lot of us out.  Then again, it wouldn't really help out the people who don't deserve to be in jail.  The ones who are just out living their daily lives and get mugged, raped, etcetera.  They would get really screwed over because the people who should be in jail for serious shit would be out roaming around repeatedly doing the thing they should be in jail for.  Sounds like fun to me.  It would make life a lot more exciting.  But, to the real downside of this whole Jesus belief.  If someone were a good person.  You know, just did minor sins like lying, taking the lord's name in vain, things of that nature.  The things that really don't harm anyone else.  If they hadn't accepted Jesus as their lord and saviour, they would go to hell.  Seems kind of fucked up to me.  The good person who never gave grief to anyone else gets a life sentence of ass rape, while the guy with 300 confirmed kills gets an express ticket into heaven.  I don't know about you folks, but that seems kind of illogical to me.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Intelligence.

Most of us have noticed by now that intelligence as a whole is spiralling downward for quite a time now.  It's not that our species is getting dumber for no good reason, it's because we hate our young people having to suffer actual consequences.  Because of this we've made almost everything easier to deal with, especially school.  The passing grades are being lowered every year or so.  Another good reason that this intellectual decline has been going on is because most of the smarter people are waiting for the economy to get better, while the really stupid ones are fucking anything that walks.  That causes more children to be born through stupid parents who teach their children nothing but how to live off of the system.  End welfare, and this would be gone.  I mean, without welfare these stupid parents wouldn't  have a reason to have thirty kids.  They'd have a reason to not even have one, when you think about it.  I mean, without welfare and food stamps they'd be forced to work to pay for themselves.  That seems like a horrifying reality to those people, but an amazing one to anyone else.  I personally enjoy the idea because it involves lazy people from a first world country suffering over minor things.  I've always loved that.